Attack of the clones

Vintage Barbie clones, despite their undeniable fug, are a nifty alternative to “real” vintage Barbies.

At first glance, they look like the real thing. The Dusty Springfield-esque eye make-up, the snooty expression, and the insane bodily proportions are all present. But cheaply produced Hong Kong clones from the ’60s are made out of feather-light hollow plastic and have all sorts of quality control problems. One of mine has one leg that’s a good half-centimetre longer than the other, suggesting a stacked heel might be in order. The other has ragged plastic around her hands, and both are partially bald, making hairstyling a tricky prospect.

All that aside, they’re a heck of a lot cheaper than vintage Barbies and are not without their own idiosyncratic charms. When I went to pay for one at the vintage collectibles market where I found her, the man behind the counter exclaimed, “Oh, I love the fake Barbies! They look so mean, like they beat the other Barbies up!” I can’t disagree. There’s something amusingly off-kilter and cockeyed about them, and they have a cranky quality that Barbies lack. They might be from the wrong side of the tracks, but their underdog charms just might win you over.